i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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