I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
He passed out mid-signature
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
