how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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