At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
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