): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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