I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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