wrigley field is MILF paradise
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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