with your own penis?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
