you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize