i think my tv is drunk
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
