I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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