you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Randomize
