Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
