i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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