Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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