Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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