Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
