New invention idea: vibrating tampons
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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