I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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