hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
