The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
