I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
