Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
