he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
