: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
