we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
