He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
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