O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
