And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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