i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
