i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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