Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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