Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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