Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
