he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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