Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
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