just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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