Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
