Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
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