White coat. Heels.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
