mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
