how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
it hurts more in the daytime
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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