Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Randomize
