Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
