i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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