Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
