I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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