I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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