I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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