and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
and you fell through a lawn chair
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
